When John and I got married, his sisters and I quickly decided that the whole “in-law” designation was unnecessary. I may look a little less Asian (not that much less Asian, though, right?), but in any sense that really mattered, we were now sisters.

Recently, we added another lady to the ranks. John’s older brother, Karl, recently proposed—quite beautifully—to his wonderful girlfriend, Cecilia (check out her blogs here and here).

I got a call that Saturday night from Cecilia, telling me the good news. Apparently, Cecilia suggested to Karl that he call John at the same time she called me. He was busy tending to the small party they had at John and Karl’s parents’ house, so only I got a call. I told John, who then texted Karl his congratulations.

That moment was not the first in which I knew something about Karl’s life before John did, and I’m sure it will not be the last. Earlier that week, Karl had been playing with his band in Maine. John had no idea. I did, because I’d talked to Cecilia. It’s not that John and Karl don’t have a good relationship, or that they don’t catch up frequently enough. Cecilia and I just talk more.

Although I don’t imagine they’d want it that way, with Cecilia’s official entrance into the family, John and Karl will never really need to talk to each other again. Cecilia and I have it covered.

The question now is whether I really have to call her my brother-in-law’s wife. That kind of takes forever, and it puts us at a greater distance than we are, in terms of friendship.

But then a sister by any other name is still a sister, no?