Here you'll find current musings, as well as the archives from two blogs of yesteryear: YoungMarriedMom and What I Learned While Writing a Novel. Please comment and share. We love well when we are in conversation with one another.
Today you are ten months old. I can see your babyness starting to melt away, and it is bittersweet.
On the one hand, I love where you are right now. You pull up to stand, chew on, or pull up to stand and then chew on everything that comes your way. Seriously, everything. Toys, the ottoman, the rug, the curtains. You have a beautiful smile, a wonderful laugh, and you are so, so happy. You do a scrunchy thing with your nose that can turn any bad day into a good one. You are snuggly and just clingy enough to make me appreciate how fabulous it is to be your mom.
Last week, I am certain that you said, “wa-da” for water. You were in your high chair and it was your response when I asked what you wanted. I am so sure because you signed it and said it. You say, “Mamamama” for me and, “Nananana” when you want food. I love to hear your voice. You’re starting to take Jacob’s lead and sing and pray at church, too—“Ba ba ba ba!” I can’t wait to hear what else you’re thinking as we get into the months ahead.
In just two months, you will be a year old. Wow! A year! I am so grateful for this year of watching you grow from a little, little guy into this chunky, jolly ball of little boy. I can’t wait to watch you take off walking and start talking more and more.
It’s easy to tell that you and Jacob are brothers, but there are so many differences between the two of you: your eyes, your teeth, your hair, the fact that you didn’t test positive for ANY food allergies—praise God!, the mischievous glint we think we sometimes see in your eye, how you can go zero to sixty when you get upset. I can’t believe a year ago you were still in my belly, and I was waiting to meet you. And the months before that, after we lost Ethan and I wanted to have another baby so, so badly.
I said you cling to me a little, and there’s a reason that’s so important to me. Right after you were born, you were lying on top of me, and right away you held tight to my finger and didn’t let go for a long, long time. I needed that. You let me know you were really there, that my prayer was answered with a “Yes!”, that God had bigger and more plans for our family. You still hold my hand when I nurse you sometimes, and it is a reminder of the goodness of God, His love and mercy. You really are like an angel to me.
Jacob loves you so very much too. I keep telling him not to tackle you, but he doesn’t really listen, and you don’t seem to mind. We kind of think you’re going to end up bigger than Jacob, so maybe it’s fair for him to get to be stronger for a little while.
When you have trouble sleeping, we all have trouble sleeping, and that is something I hope we’ll say goodbye to once you reach your birthday. When you are sleeping, though, your face is so peaceful, so beautiful. You are such a handsome little guy. You are so, so loved.
The next few months are filled with holidays, and they always seems to fly by. Not that this year has been slow-paced! But still, I’m so excited for your next year, to get to know the wonderful, exceptional person we can already see you are.
I love you with all my heart, always, forever, no matter what.